HOLIDAY LIFE COACH
Let me be your holiday life coach! It would be a privilege! The holidays are approaching. Whether you view the holidays through a religious, spiritual, or secular lens, this time of year most likely contains extra stress. This season is stressful for those who are survivors of abuse and trauma or not. Not many are immune to the extra pressures.
If you are a survivor of childhood sexual abuse or childhood trauma of any type, you may experience more challenges. If the abuser was a family member, seeing the perpetrator at family gatherings may be triggering. Many survivors no longer have the abuse/perpetrator in their lives at all. This physical detachment from the abuser may cause ripple effects. The possibility exists that you are ostracized (overtly or covertly) by other family members. Maybe you now feel family-less.
Some survivors of childhood abuse are labeled mentally ill especially by the abuser. If you do not accept the perpetrator’s view (and others related to the abuser), you quite likely feel the added pressure of not being believed.
“They are committing the greatest indignity human beings can inflict on one another: telling people who have suffered excruciating pain and loss that their pain and loss were illusions. (v)”
― Elie Wiesel, Night
For those further on their healing paths, the holidays still may consist of stress – financially, emotionally, and possibly spiritually.
Spiritual abuse, clergy abuse, and ritual abuse (deviant religious practices), all carry their own baggage even if you have traveled miles on your road of healing. It takes time to experience growth as well as healing. Thriving is possible!
If you are not a survivor of spiritual abuse, the holidays may still bring up spiritual or religious concerns. Many people were raised in a certain religion and no longer believe. It can be helpful to share your thoughts and emotions with a non-judgmental holiday life coach, such as myself.
Recently I noticed that when I attend church, I no longer sit at the end of the pew in order to leave freely if the need arises. (I am a survivor of spiritual abuse, clergy abuse, as well as extreme abuse and torture or ritual abuse.) One day, I realized I gravitate toward the middle of the pew. Growth occurred slowly in direct and subtle ways.
“Because I remember, I despair. Because I remember, I have the duty to reject despair.”
– Elie Wiesel
As a holiday life coach and a survivor, I am well aware of the increase in stress during the entire holiday season. The pressure can grow even if you like the holiday times and look forward to them with joy.
I, as your holiday coach, will listen with my full attention to your concerns. My role is not as a therapist to explore the past. You most likely have insight into your past. I am able though to support you as you maneuver through this six to eight week period beginning now and through January 1, 2017.
What are your plans?
How do you decide what value you assign to Thanksgiving, Christmas, Hanukkah, or New Year? How do you want to celebrate any or none of these days?
Time and financial constraints may need to be considered. Do you travel to see extended family? Do they visit you? Are you in a situation where you will spend the holidays alone? Is that okay with you?
If you are still dealing with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), what are your options for self care? PTSD or not, taking care of oneself with compassion is essential. How do you balance your needs, family obligations and work?
As your holiday life coach who cherishes the tool of writing or of keeping a journal, it is your choice to talk freely and spontaneously in sessions or to share via your writings. Both are extremely beneficial and powerful. Remember – you are empowered in sessions with me. Oh, I will also help with accountability for you to keep on track with your goals and desires.
I shall help you focus via listening to you with my heart and mind. Gentle guidance and questions will be offered. Change, peace, and joy are possible.
It will be exciting to be your individual holiday life coach! I have learned from my own past life experiences during many holiday seasons after facing and healing from the abuse and trauma in my life.
These six to eight weeks can be less stressful and more rewarding. You can find freedom, peace, and joy amidst this hectic season. Freedom may consist of taking time for you to reflect.